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Bringing Down the Inner Walls Posted on: 2006/1/7 15:04
Just can't stay away
2005/12/31 8:22
Posts: 90
Begin with bringing down the inner walls that close one off from self and other selves. The inner walls allow one to judge and condemn self and other sleves and is the day-to-day voice masked as grief, often buried deep within, so even the carrier of such emotion is unaware what they are actually experieincing. A deep longing of unfilled needs persists.

Blocking this grief and sadness prevents it from falling away naturally. Leaving it in tact disconnects one from being fully here NOW. Bitterness and frustration become old pals when the walls are left in place throughout a lifetime. Yet, this can change. The head and heart cease to communicate and attaining a conscious state seems unreachable to most. It is a futile chase until one surrender's an acceptance of letting go of the inner walls.

It is very unsettling to come face to face with the shadow side of repressed emotions at first, the dark night of the soul and the only way is to go through it. Many will try to stand still, to pretend it away, medicate it, smile and push it deeper. The way out is to embrace it with all one has. This can not be done alone. Rather a higher spiritual belief is necessary, as well as, support from peers, family, and preferrably those who have walked this same path and made it through again and again.

I believe with courage, faith, and tenacity it can be done again and again by anyone willing. It will mean embracing a lengthy stretch of intensely private suffering, if mind chooses to see it as such. Generally the first few treks down this path, this is the experience many choose, the ego fears change and is still in power. With practice each journey becomes lighter and quicker, the ego looses its control over the thoughts, the will and the soul and the new heat/mind thought can be one of acceptance and non-resistance, making the change easier with each new passage through.

Like a well traveled hiker each journey down this path beholds its own worth and unique purpose that only the one wearing the hiking boots truly realizes, for they behold the bigger picture within. The choice of how one perceives the process is a personal one...remember this. Hike with a trusted friend. Hand in hand the journey will take upon it a greater lightness. It will require making a moral inventory of self, one made in fearlessness. Do not turn back when those familiar feelings rear their head in depression, lonliness, disorientation, fear, and inadequacies. Rather hold your head up, focused and attentive and keep moving forward. Honestly be there for self. Allow others to be in service to you, do no reject them out of shame and guilt.

Only through such honest authenticity can true spiritual awareness awaken wholeness and see one through to the other side of the journey. It is a journey one makes many times throughout a lifetime. It is a step made not once, but over and over as each nuance is awakened, realized, accepted and action taken to alleviate the negative effects it has had on ones life to this point.
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